Filed under: accessories, entertainment, femme dangereuse, gadgetry, haute, in the house, intoxicants, retro, seriously unladylike behaviour, sin in general, smoking, the next big thing, vanity
Jesus Christ, Shepherd of Judea, this is the most amazing hookah pipe I’ve ever laid eyes on. Sleek. Silvery. Grown up. Portable. A conversation piece. Tiny, manageable, and comes standard with two mouthpieces. Like for a date. A sexy date. How lovely… From the site:
But that’s not all, it also comes with an elegant and beautiful carrying bag so you can take it with you to the next dinner party you are invited to and show off your cool. In any case, here’s some tech info you might find relevant and convincing, in case the gorgeous design hasn’t won you over yet:
Body and handle of narghile in solid polished pewter, brilliant nish-Burner made of hi-tech ceramic. Pipe made of aeronautical polyamide treated with Te on.
2 mouthpieces made of culinary standard nacrine (i.e. synthetic mother-of-pearl).
Tongs for tobacco and charcoal – Carrying case.
Filed under: accessories, death by cute, femme dangereuse, haute, in the house, jersey love, lust, rage, retro, sassy, sin in general, smooth criminal
Oh, my God, this was like, made with my bedroom in mind. Never mind the “Sweeney Todd” thing, this is the hottest mirror I’ve ever had. Femme Dangereuse, indeed.
Filed under: cheap, eat, in the house, indolence, kitchen, love, shopping, the next big thing
Seriously, I’m not kidding. How can Trader Joe’s be so good and so cheap and so awesomeriffic? These Veggie Masala burgers (I believe I mocked my roommate for purchasing them on one of our shopping trips but later snuck them in my cart) are really easy to heat up and super, super tasty. And potatoey. And curry-tasty. What else do you need to hear?
Filed under: accessories, cosplay, fetish, geek love, haute, in the house, kitchen, lingerie, lust, pin-ups, rage, retro, sanctimony, wear
It must know me pretty well, because this is totally something I’d wear. And after weeks of constantly infiltrating the sidebars of blogs I read with suggestions based on my browsing history, I’m sold on cherry aprons. I give in, okay? Send me two.
Filed under: accessories, death by cute, eat, haute, in the house, kitchen, lust, retro, shopping
I absolutely have to own these amazing bowls. I didn’t really think bowls could be improved by a stem, but this is genius. Not only are they aesthetically enticing (bowls!), but the stem is a boon if your mom, like mine, insists you have a hole in your lip. And it even affords you privacy if you don’t want people’s eyes all over your Boo-Berry.
Filed under: entertainment, fetish, geek love, in the house, indolence, love, lust, pillaging, retro, sanctimony, sin in general
Something about naughtifying your standard bedtime tales is just very hot. This collection of erotic fairytales speaks to the princess fantasies every girl has, and probably the dominatrix ones, too. I want it for the subway.
Filed under: accessories, fetish, gadgetry, in the house, indolence, lust, sex, sin in general
This sexy spherical gadget is billed as good for couples- with a certain focus I can see that as the case. However, the sleek, smooth curve also seems ideal for the intended purpose. Plus, it looks quite portable and pretty stealthy if you’ve gotta take it abroad.
Filed under: accessories, death by cute, fetish, haute, in the house, kitchen, lingerie, lust, pin-ups, retro, sex, sin in general
I’ve been scouting home decor- since, you know, I have a home now- and I just adore this naughty, spank-me-worthy spice decanter from Comunistar. It kinda resembles a fembot, right? Anyway, good design, but definitely also a conversation piece.
Filed under: accessories, brooklyn, death by cute, drink, eat, entertainment, fetish, gadgetry, geek love, in the house, indolence, intoxicants, jack white, lust, retro, sex, sin in general, smoking
- Smoking- In addition to my beloved Djarums, I am also digging these weird Springwater cigs. Smoking is so underrated.
- Trader Joe’s- It’s like someone hosed the place down in awesome and win. Tarte d’Alsace and some two buck Chuck makes you almost feel not-poor for like, fifteen whole minutes. Truffles for under $3. Real instant mash. Natural beauty supplies. If only they added house brand valium and vicodin and staffed it with teenage brits, I’d never leave.
- Queer as Folk reruns on Logo- anyone who hates on touchy touchy boylove needs to watch Brian and Justin dancing at the prom. I can’t think of anything more romantic in the history of romance ever.
- My imaginary boyfriend- is he real? Even I’m not sure anymore but I’ve still never seen anyone cuter. If I’m remembering right.
Leading me to…
- Hitachi Magic Wand- It’s just so powerful, I might have to tell my roommates I use it for old car accident injuries. Every time Boondock Saints is on, my back just starts acting up. Especially during the outtakes.
- Jesus Christ it’s a lion, get in the car! Please, God, let the internets stop producing memes so I can get some sleep.
- Leisurewear- It’s gotten to the point where my one career goal is to be able to wear sexy sweats and sleek sneakers. Career garb is so awful in so many ways, it always feels dirty.
- Jay-Z’s American Gangster- I think this album is gonna give The Black Album a serious run for its money in the long-term. Yeah, I said it. Fucking genius, this is.
- On Demand Programming- why can’t the fuckwits who are responsible for cable make one that fucking works already? I’m paying $3 a month, and I want to watch Hookers at the Point for the sixteenth time. Damn you, iO.
- My car- Newark is so fucking weird- I can leave my easy-to-park-in space and be in the Holland Tunnel in ten minutes. You can’t even get from Tillary Street to the Manhattan Bridge in that amount of time, who knew? Anyway, driving stick in Jersey traffic is scary, but now I have a Beetle again.
- Scrabulous- Eamon playing “VAGINA” for twelve points, shocking only that it came two whole plays into the game.
- Burger King pranking customers- you mean other than serving them Burger King food?
- My toddler versus my prized possessions- this pint-sized terrorist has a knack for destroying electronics and media in seconds, while you’re just trying to form the “nuh” in “no.” Then she manages to turn on the waterworks and make you feel guilty.
- Jack White- sexy, cheeky, mysterious, and tall. Considering all that and the hair, I’d marry him like, right this second.
Filed under: accessories, cheap, entertainment, gadgetry, in the house, indolence, lingerie, retro, shopping, smoking
Okay, so I haven’t posted since last Thursday. It’s been a busy couple of units of time. I had to move out of my apartment, on pretty short notice at that. It takes forfuckingever to find a place in the naked city, and after a few eh experiences, I found a commune in Newark to move to. So most of my time has been spent singing kum-ba-yah, smoking pot, and arguing over whose cruelty-free tofu burgers are in whose freezer. I’m kidding, you can totally get in trouble for saying stuff like that on your blog nowadays. And besides, would I eat a tofu burger? And it’s actually sort of co-housing, not a commune. In Newark of all places.
So living in a commune loft is actually pretty cool. It’s mostly boys, so there are no estrogen fueled hysterics. Plus, it’s a cool old converted factory, so I get to build all up in it. And I can rollerskate here. Some things that make co-housing situations overall better, IMHO- or, my loot:
These are my shiny red pots. Awesome, awesome pots. Top marks.
A sexy robe…
This tool makes you Macgyver in like three seconds. The rub? You need one of these motherfuckers to open it!
Lighting! I did this all by myself. The cords came from IKEA, but you can get them and the shades from Pearl River.
Filed under: accessories, cheap, death by cute, gadgetry, in the house, indolence, retro, sex, shopping, sin in general, sleep
So I found some more star lights. I can imagine a cluster of these would create a soft, romantic glow in a bedroom And they’re crazy cheap.
Filed under: accessories, boys, death by cute, fetish, geek love, in the house, love, lust, sex, shopping, sleep, totally gay, wear
So many good things, I couldn’t be arsed to narrow it down:
Sex flashcards. So goshdarn cute.
Hand-holding mittens. Cause plain ones aren’t gay enough.
Tree locket. Just adorable.
Happy Buddha pen stand- to ward off bad work juju.
And a sappy pillow.
“If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you.”
Filed under: accessories, boys, death by cute, fetish, gadgetry, geek love, in the house, lust, retro, sex, sin in general, the good fight
More on organization fetish. Many women’s magazine’s posit couples need to schedule their romance and stick to it. That’s not such a bad idea, but it sounds pretty unsexy. This pretty little planner is an adorable way to do that. Artfully styled, and very useful.
Filed under: boys, cheap, death by cute, entertainment, geek love, haute, in the house, indolence, lust, retro, sex, sin in general, sleep
I’ve been wanting an Airstream like, whoa lately. Something about the idea of an inexpensive (compared to a house), super-mod, goes-anywhere abode is so thrilling and bohemian. The city life thing can really grind you down, and you can’t drive your apartment down to Florida for the weekend. Also, they have a very romantic pod-like feel to them- as if you could create a dirty weekend with no notice and no planning. Coooool.
Filed under: accessories, boys, fetish, gadgetry, geek love, haute, in the house, indolence, lust, sex, sin in general
Any bad boy or girl with a collection of toys will appreciate the Sex Kitten Toy Storage Pillow from Boudoir Essentials. Keeping the kids or cats out of your personal toy box is always a challenge, and this will blend right in with your leopard and/or pink and black bordello boudoir couture. And it’s fuzzy.
Filed under: cheap, death by cute, in the house, indolence, lingerie, lust, pin-ups, retro, sales, sex, shopping, sin in general, sleep, wear
In my never ending quest for comfy, cute slips, I stumbled across this adorable sale piece from- wait for it- the Gap. Soft red cotton trimmed with wide lace strips. It’s sexy and practical. Kinda like me.
Filed under: entertainment, fetish, geek love, in the house, love, lust, ravaging, sex, sin in general
I like the naughty minimalism of this cherry red sex deck from Toys in Babeland. I also like the suggestion to leave one for your lover to find at some point in the day- kind of like a to do list.
Filed under: death by cute, gadgetry, geek love, ha, haute, in the house, indolence, jewels, love, lust
I have a thing for crescent moons- I have one tattooed over my sternum. Via Geekologie, a moon for your house. It’s like, from Russia or something. Huge, but if I had a big old converted barn I bet I could make it work.
Filed under: boys, in the house, indolence, love, lust, sex, sin in general
As a bit of a klutz but a total romantic, I have the most mixed feelings about this cool bed. While the suspension seems comfortable and relaxing, I know an ER visit can’t be far away. And aesthetically, it could be better. But still, I want one!
Filed under: brooklyn, entertainment, fetish, geek love, ha, in the house, indolence, pin-ups, retro, sassy, sex, sin in general, the good fight
Oh, dear. Vice Vixen needs a job! This was unexpected and while it couldn’t come at a worse time, when is it a good time to look for a job? Still, we all know I get my by any means on whenever there’s a drought, and I’ve already dusted off my resume and made some good connections. So…
Young professional;
Excellent writing skills;
Whip smart;
Able to solve problems creatively;
thoughtful and articulate;
works well on a team;
great phone skills;
takes direction well;
helpful;
sunny disposition;
hands on;
works well under pressure;
culturally diverse;
excellent customer service skills;
and professional appearance.
Available for interview immediately. Hiring?
Filed under: accessories, brooklyn, death by cute, geek love, haute, in the house, indolence, lust, nyc, pin-ups, retro, sassy
I’ve always wanted a swanky-pants office. And this one just completely takes the cake. Gorgeous. Amazing. Inspiring. Pink. Oh, Design Sponge. Y u so crazy awesome?
Filed under: accessories, cheap, death by cute, in the house, lust, retro, shopping
I fell in love with this silly little dresser from JC Penney. It’s sleek and black and curved and stylish and would look perfect in the bedroom I have in my head. I hope it’s around when I stop being homeless. There’s a cherry-reddish version if you’re feeling more traditional.
Filed under: accessories, bathing, death by cute, fetish, geek love, haute, in the house, pin-ups, retro, sex, sin in general, vanity
Via Uncrate, cool retro sexiness in a bath towel. Who knew?
Filed under: accessories, cheap, death by cute, geek love, in the house, pin-ups, retro
and write a note by hand. A lot of my favorite magazines have been doing stories on bespoke and generally fancy stationary, and I’m always put off by the high prices and bleh designs. E-mails- lets face it- generally look dumb with colors, strange fonts, and images embedded. So when you’re not using it, you can get something colorful and unique at this etsy shop. This chick makes all kinds of retro, whimsical, crisp designs. And they’re insanely reasonably priced.
Filed under: eat, fetish, geek love, in the house, lust, retro, sex, shopping, sin in general
I’ve always had a jones for industrial stuff- restaurant ware, vats of ketchup, anything you need a special license or card or blagging skills to buy. I immediately fell for these super sturdy, school issue tables. Not only for their hardiness and super-stealiness, but also because they’d be perfect for playing tie me up detention.
I am not a person who knows a lot about animals. I recently misidentified an albatross as a “fish”, I think dogs are too leapy and excited, and cats are like lethal sneezing poison to me. I saw this future crazy cat lady on Confessions of a Matchmaker and she had something called a “sugar glider“- I had to look it up because I’ve never heard of them and they’re really frickin’ adorable. I want one for Christmas!
Filed under: accessories, boys, fetish, geek love, haute, in the house, indolence, lingerie, love, lust, pin-ups, ravaging, sex, sin in general
This pricey little number is patently adorable. A heart charm, Swarovski crystals, and gorgeous bright feather cuffs are light, sweet, and totally romantic. I love their innocent feel because being tied up is totally naughty.
Filed under: accessories, cheap, drink, eat, in the house, indolence, shopping, sin in general, vanity
you know you need one. I can’t talk, I order in like, three meals a day.
Filed under: accessories, cheap, drink, haute, in the house, indolence, intoxicants
I like coffee weirdly. Well, many people like iced coffee. I’ll drink it iced but I don’t care much as long as it’s not hot. I like espresso-strength coffee. I don’t like supermarkety stuff like Folger’s because it’s Vietnamese coffee and too acidic and watery and stupid tasting. I like enough of it that it takes a while to drink.
I would generally get a “ghetto latte” from Starbucks or a Dunkin’ Donuts latte if I was lazy. But it was a pain to get and I really wanted the power to have coffee without leaving my house. My excellent boss Jennifer gave me an amazing FrancisFrancis in super-cool orange but I am superstitious about setting it up til I move.
Anyway, I found this awesome stuff (N.O. Brew) whilst surfing Amazon. I ordered some after a week and a half of waffling and It. Is. Awesome. Perfect coffee. Cans of coffee have tons of thickeners and other weirdness in them- this is just perfect, perfect, perfect. Mixed with milk, it tastes fresh and real and perfect. And it lasts for like 3 weeks in the fridge.
But now I need the perfect thermos. >Sigh<
ETA: Ghetto Lattes on Wikipedia!
Filed under: accessories, cheap, geek love, in the house, indolence, love, sleep
I’ve never been the type to get sidelined with cramps, but if I did, I’d want one of these cutesy heart hot-water bottles. A mild consolation when you’re doubled over in bed watching Lifetime Movie Network. (Just admit it, everyone knows.)
Filed under: accessories, cheap, in the house, indolence, intoxicants, love, lust, sex, sin in general
I tend to hang on to empty pretty bottles. I’ve even been known to buy them at old Amish farms. But I never knew what to do with them. If you like candles and drinking, these handy wine cork candles set a mood with what you have available. Cool huh?
Filed under: entertainment, gadgetry, geek love, in the house, indolence, pillaging, sex, sin in general
…could be hosted in one of these awesome things. They sell for $500K and accommodate like 8 million people. Awesomeriffic!
Filed under: accessories, cheap, entertainment, gadgetry, in the house, indolence, intoxicants, sin in general
Isn’t it a pain in the ass to come into smokeable substances totally unprepared? This little device makes that less likely. I mean, you might not wanna bring it everywhere (your boss might steal it, for instance), but at least you can be discreetly prepared.
Filed under: accessories, drink, in the house, indolence, intoxicants, shopping
I’m much more of a smoker than a drinker, but we all need like to get our drunk on sometimes. This sleek kit has everything you need to make drinks but the booze. OMG, hotel party!
Filed under: accessories, drink, haute, in the house, indolence, intoxicants, lust, pillaging, retro, sin in general
Wanna drink so much you need a fountain to decant it? If you’re not lucky enough to have Europeans to smuggle absinthe over for you, I imagine you can decant any drink from this gorgeous piece. It’s like, the gift that always fits!
Filed under: cheap, fetish, gadgetry, geek love, in the house, retro, shopping
…really, I do. I get so worked up over the promise of a pretty new toy that will make my life easier. These fancy mousepads sport calendars and to-do lists, and spiff up your desktop. Sweet.
Filed under: in the house, indolence, intoxicants, lust, sex, sin in general
This is so cool! I alternately like to lay, drape, and sit bolt upright and this one piece of furniture does all three. Too cool!
Filed under: geek love, ha, in the house, indolence, intoxicants, sanctimony, sin in general, the good fight
Me too, honey, me too.
Filed under: accessories, fetish, gadgetry, geek love, haute, in the house, indolence, love, lust, pin-ups, sex, sin in general, vanity
These swanky vibrators are the Birkin bag or Manolo maryjanes of sex toys. Made of 24K gold and stainless steel, they’re gorgeously emblazoned with the legend “Fuck Design”- and how. They’re nearly silent but powerful, waterproof, and hold varying temperatures for hot and cold experimentation. And my birthday’s not till March. >whimperpout<
Filed under: accessories, boys, discount codes, fetish, gadgetry, geek love, in the house, indolence, lust, sex, sin in general
Firstly, from the files of captain obvious, every girl needs one of these fancy tools. * Honestly, it’s the best appliance I’ve ever purchased. Better even than my Kitchen-Aid stand mixer. Really and truly. You’ll never go back to a slimline, and it has the added bonus of being useful for its intended purpose, too. Mas useful for trips home, that.
However, the second and awesomerifficest part about it is that it drives boys mad. If you are doing something to your fella, and you apply this to the base of his cash-and-prizes while you carry on, he will scream and perhaps cry. Just don’t forget an extension cord, I think this thing was created with socket fetishists in mind. A true must have.
(Also, we have a BE code: vixensummer. It’s for the mermaid collection.)
This elegant, striking resin box is very reasonably priced for such a cutely designed piece. This would be a nice to hide away anything you wanna keep away from prying eyes. And I went a whole entire post without saying you can keep your weed in there!
Filed under: accessories, gadgetry, geek love, in the house, indolence, sin in general, smoking
Or, in this case, engineering. And what a beautiful thing. This handy pipe and lighter combo is sleek, discreet, and sexy. And no one can pocket your lighter without pocketing your pipe, too. Excellent idea!
Filed under: accessories, bathing, boys, cheap, fetish, in the house, indolence, lust, sex, sin in general
You might as well pick yourself up some of these super handy, waterproof spa lights. Do I need to explain why seeing underwater is useful? Plus, candles can ignite hair, washcloths, or get splashed out. And of course, they don’t work underwater, so you can’t see the action.
Filed under: bathing, boys, in the house, indolence, love, lust, sex, sin in general
Bathing by yourself can be relaxing, but I can’t think of a time I’d rather have company. It’s infinitely more calming and fun, especially if you really fancy your bathing partner. And I may sound old fashioned, but you should. This bath is both aesthetically pleasing and roomy, and a well-placed mirror would probably make me never want to get out.
Filed under: boys, entertainment, fetish, in the house, indolence, lust, sex, sin in general, sleep
This is one object of lust possession-wise that I can’t elaborate on past the pic. Just cool. It needs a canopy of some sort, even though they can distract boys a little.
Filed under: accessories, cheap, geek love, in the house, jack white, love, pin-ups, retro, shopping
I live in Brooklyn, a place full of eternal adolescents. A dad and baby with matching mohawks are not an uncommon sight here. Hammerpress has some awesome artsy prints and rock posters that wouldn’t look out of place in your CB2, Ikea, or Pottery Barn bedecked living room. And they’re well priced, too.
Seriously- exactly *why* did this take so long to exist? At our daily what-the-hell are we gonna eat lunchtime meeting, I scanned menupages in the vain hope some interesting new lunch provider had magically appeared among the contenders. Recently, I noticed Insomnia Cookies lurking about and I was immediately entranced. They bring cookies to you! They encourage it! You don’t even need the pretense of ordering dinner like you do at the lovely 7th Avenue Donut Shop. They will just bring you cookies and not judge. And they’re only open nights and late, too, so let’s not pretend we don’t know their market. Please, come to Brooklyn. Add some token spelt cookies and you will own Park Slope. We all have screaming children, no cars, and an inclination towards indulgent and high-falutin concepts.
Filed under: accessories, cheap, entertainment, gadgetry, in the house, indolence, sin in general, smoking
Part of my inspiration for this blog is the marginalization of vices. As someone who has many, I know that even if you like to smoke, that doesn’t mean you want to do it out of a replica of Bob Marley’s head. Maybe you think the Grateful Dead bears are stupid and juvenile. This pretty pyrex piece is subtle enough to live in a grown-up’s house, yet functional and sturdy enough to feature at your next dinner party.
Thumbing through Etsy, I discovered this very talented printmaker and his ridiculously well-priced and stunning prints. If you like retro stuff, it can be really hard to incorporate that into your house without being kitschy. These prints are edgy, versatile, and affordable enough that you could group them if you want. (Due to the nature of Etsy, check the seller’s main page if the link expires.)
